It’s so easy to wind up absolutely full of despair and self disparagement about your desires and fantasies. There’s all this pressure on men nowadays to perform masculinity perfectly, and that’s just such a downer. When you have domination fantasy themes in your erotic desires you can wind up denying yourself out of some attempt to be a ‘real man’. Self denial is boring and awful and I think you shouldn’t do that to yourself. Denying you is my job, anyway, so you should be more kind to yourself and have that indulgence from time to time. Let yourself want what you want and take steps to get what you need in life. And that includes whatever makes your dirty erotic heart go pit-a-pat.
Domination Fantasy Affirmation
What I have for you today is an affirmation to reassure yourself with! Your desires for submission and cock control are perfectly normal and are NOT things that should be ignored and denied. This is an important part of who you are, deep down inside, and they aren’t things that should ever be used to shame or demean you (unless that turns you on and you’ve agreed to participate in an erotic humiliation scenario ahead of time.) Not all men are dominant alpha male types, no matter what talking heads on the platform formerly known as Twitter might say. Remember that every time someone goes out of their way to try to make you behave in a certain way that they gain something from your compliance and self hatred. Try to move towards the places that make room for you to be what you are, the way you want to be. Move towards greater personal freedom and expression and not away from that. Your need to be good and obey is not a bad thing! On to the affirmation:
Repeat As Needed
My desires are healthy and good for me.
I yearn to submit, and that is good.
I yearn to submit, and that is fine.
I yearn to submit, and that makes my Mistress proud.
My desires are good.
My desires are what make me whole.
What I desire is what I work towards,
where I put my effort is into myself.
My desires should not be denied!
Remember the Tantric Mantra method! Close your eyes, and focus on your breath, and your body. Relax your jaw, your shoulders should drop down. Make sure you’re not clenching your fists. Sit with your knees at least two hands width apart, if not wider! Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Repeat “I yearn to submit” over and over again. Let the sounds of the words become meaningless in your mind.
Ready To Submit Yet?
If you’re not quite ready to admit that you need to be guided, controlled, and dominated, that’s fine. You’ll get there. As you begin to use this domination fantasy affirmation method you’ll soften towards your own needs and desires. Instead of building the emotional habit and associated callus towards your desires, you’ll find yourself becoming more accepting of your own fantasies and wants. This is a good thing! It can feel a little scary, to begin to stretch yourself towards your own liberation from social conditioning. There is still all that pressure from the outside world about how you’re ‘supposed to’ be and act, and you’ll find yourself backsliding into the comfortable habit of emotional self censoring. Just go back to your affirmation, and back to the kindness and compassion towards yourself that leads to the deepest of all freedoms: the freedom to be yourself even in the face of our culture’s insistence that you be different. The freedom to be the pervert you really are.
You Know What To Do
Like falling down, when you’re ready to give in to your domination fantasy and make it a reality, you’ll call me up. It will feel easy and natural to ask our dispatchers to let you speak with me, and then, to tell me what you’ve been dreaming about. And I’ll meet you with the same compassion and kindness, and help you make that scenario into a reality. You need to be guided and controlled, and I can give you that. When you’re ready, it will be as natural as breathing.
Your Domination Fantasy Mistress, Harper
The pressure to be the alpha can be crippling, especially when you know it’s a facade. Centering yourself with a healing mantra and acknowledging that you aren’t an alpha, that you don’t need to be an alpha, and that your self worth isn’t tied to what others project is real power.
Yes! That is exactly right, Sissy Teri! Letting go of society’s ideas about who you are and how you’re supposed to be is so very freeing and affirming.
Your Mantra that I am supposed to repeat oddly reminds me a lot of that early 90s song “What I Am”
What I am is what I am; Are you what you are or what? ♪
It’s an extremely important concept, accepting ourselves for who we are without shame even when society at large has a goal of shaming us for who we are.
It can be very difficult, especially having grown up in a culture that explicitly shames who we are but it extremely important.
If we can’t accept ourselves for who we are then it becomes far more difficult to accept others for who they are and the reverse is also true. If we can’t accept others for who they are it becomes a lot more difficult to accept ourselves for who we are.
This I believe is summed up by the concept “Love thy neighbor” but too often “Love thyself” isn’t emphasized. Thank you for emphasizing it.
All you need is Love, love; Love is all you need ♪
You know I have a whole thing around self acceptance and a refusal of shame. Shame and guilt can be useful, in that they help us fit in socially. But misplaced shame or guilt over something as simple as ‘being horny’ is useless and harmful to ourselves and others, as you point out!
Self love is a vital part of loving the world. Aren’t we part of the world?
cues up “We Are The World” on ear-worm playlist…
Oh, you are so right about the pressures and I am sooo glad I can come here and cum here!
Yes, submission to a woman a part of me and only gets stronger each day and YOU are teaching me that demaning me is even better! I love it from you Ms. Harper! I love it from you Ms. Harper! I love it from you Ms. Harper! I absolutely NEED to be able to obey you, I really do, so I can call you and obey!
I read those affirmations and they ring true. hey actually make us better people. Giving in willingly, surrendering to a woman, surrendering to you does make me whole. I always feel better after a session even when you ruin my orgasm and I am ‘frustrated by it, it STILL feels good because I was relaxed, even if tense with desire, so I could submit to you and be controlled and dominated and you and my other fav mistresses set me free years ago!
Ms. Harper owns me and owns me with many ‘voices’.